Housekeeping

Did some house cleaning of the online kind today and was amazed at how liberating it felt. I am a masochist, so I still had old photos waaay too handy and accounts linked to mutual friends allowing me to self-abusively peer into new lifestyles and witness new loves with mixed feelings of, “I’m glad he’s happy” and “wow, that sucks.” So, there it goes: today, I am removing the impulse to do things that are not constructive, even if you squint. I never did shy away from learning life’s lessons the hard way, but some things are just unnecessary. So! Goodbye, JB. You are special but, at least for now, you are also behind me.

And what’s in front? An afternoon poolside in Austin with my true soul mate Sara and then an evening celebrating my best friend Crystal’s birthday, complete with mini-sombrero’s and fake mustaches. You see? Boys, they come and go, but good friends are the smartest investment a girl will ever make.

Goodnight, Moon

Hello, stranger.

I neglect. Outside of the office walls, it’s what I do. Don’t take it personally. I’m no more attentive to myself these days than anyone else. But. Shall I indulgently profess this time will be different? The words will now come with regularity? Why don’t we just ‘wait and see.’

The good news is I’ve been thinking more. Road to recovery? Perhaps. Let’s hope.

Just spent an amazing weekend in Newport, where I learned to sail and steered the 12-footer for a good half-hour all on my own! I felt triumphant and a little tense at first, but I let the water’s rhythm ease my nerves (enter cradle metaphor) and enjoyed the frosty breeze. Dare I say I felt purged, somehow?

Thoughts from the road:
[Subtitle: Changes must follow]

* Hello, stranger (sound familiar?). Enter New York, lose self. If you knew this black hole was what you’d meet, would you do it all over again? Yes. Why? Lessons. I was never as close as I thought I was anyway. I was only comfortable.

* Lately, I’ve been wishing to turn back clocks and learn more from the ones I’ve left or lost.

* Let go. Stop trying to write your story and learn something unexpected from life.

Goodnight, moon.